So I spent approximately an hour (thanks charlotte :P) in the library reading. And in this short span of an hour, I’ve grown to categorize library goers into a few general groups, and at the same time, managed to instill this bloodlust in me that screams (no sorry, maybe it’s shouting, I wouldn’t know, I was too mad at that time) “Decapitate all noisy kids. Draw and quarter their charges. Hang them by their necks and let them swing until they breathe no more.”
A little extreme, you might say. But hey, Alvyn says no, and since we all know that Alvyn is king, and that the king’s word is just and right, therefore it isn’t too extreme.
Moving back on track, I’ve classified library goers into a few general groups, namely:
1. The normal kind of library goers (librarus-goeus), who generally are quiet, consciencious of their surroundings, and are really in the library to do reading, or revision. These are the kind of library goers that I Alvyn’s bloodlust level – 0
2. The kind of library goers who sit at a spot, pretend to read, and yak/sms on their handphones, or to their friends (fakus-librarus-goeus). These are the kind of people (usually immature, whiny little teenage kids, who hold on to a book, sit amongst the aisle and yak on their handphones. They usually lack a volume control knob, so their voices are always at the maximum volume. If 2 or more should be placed in the nearby vicinity, noise level doubles and interaction takes place. Alvyn’s bloodlust level – 2
3. Library goers, usually adults, who bring kids along to run around screaming and shouting in the library. (librarus-adultus-moronus) These are the kind of preppy parents who think that by bringing their satanic experiment-gone-wrong spawns to the library, the infomation from the various books will somehow magically (through osmosis me thinks. or probably via blue fucking tooth) enter the minds of their joke-of-a-spawn (or spawns), thus making them smarter. In the process, they neglect the other library goers who’re trying to fucking read a fucking book in the fucking serenity (har har) of the bloody library. Alvyn’s bloodlust level – 4
4. Kids who think that they have a God-given (since when did I give that to them?) right to brag about their apparant amazing knowledge of various kiddy subjects, ranging from ASStronomy to ASStrology. (librarus-kiddus-noobus-wannabus). These little morons really piss me off because they deem fit to tell their parents that they refuse to enter the kiddy section because “Oh my God I’m too good for little kiddy bookies, imma go get myself a book regarding the Wall Fucking Street so imma be a fucking banker when I grow up. Oops, I mean, if Alvyn doesn’t kill me before I get a chance to grow some hair on my balls! Alvyn’s bloodlust level – 4.5
5. Last but not least, adults who bring their kids to the library, thinking its their God-given (again.) right to run around, screaming and shouting. And should they magically fall flat on their kiddy fucking faces, blame it on the nearest person sitting down reading his book, alleging that the alleged leg that was allegedly stuck out at an obnoxious angle allegedly caused the alleged kid to allegedly fall down on the fucking floor. (stupidus-maximus-fuckus) Alvyn’s bloodlust level – Off the fucking chart
So, as you can see, Alvyn’s rather pissed off. And what made things worse was the fact that the library “staff”, note the parenthesises, as I deem it fit NOT to call them staff since they do nothing but sit at the counter marked “Customer Service”, smile at everybody and pretend that they’re busy. Perhaps a criteria for employment was to be deaf and mute, since they apparantly couldn’t hear the racket coming from Choa Chu Kang Library/Market place.
Anyway charlotte, if you’re reading this, I’ll be uploading the photos soon ok. Will send you the links asap.
Breaking Benjamin – Diary of Jane